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A world in a crazy jacket 9/From the Ivory Coast to ice fishing

Yoram Mizrachi

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What is allowed for France is not allowed for the USA
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The soldiers of the French brigade stationed in the Ivory Coast "as a peace force" behave (according to the natives) as if the era of colonialism has not passed from our world. In addition to displays of arrogance of the "white beating black" type, the commanders of the force, which is not affiliated with the UN units, stationed in the western country African, to depose President Laurent Gbagbo and enthrone a new ruler, a pro-French leader from the rebel camp. The president surprised the French when, in response to what he called "harassment," he ordered his air force to bomb a French unit that had entered the area of ​​Okuba, which was not included in the 2003 deployment agreement. All the planes of the corps...two Sukhoi 25 fighter bombers and seven helicopters in total.
Nine French soldiers were killed as a result of the attack and a dozen were wounded. Another American citizen was killed in the bombing who happened to be in the sensitive environment. In response to the bombing, French soldiers raided the air force base near Yamoussakar, the administrative capital of the Ivory Coast (the commercial capital is Abidjan) and destroyed the planes parked there On the track. Then a French armored column set out, intending to reach the president's residence and oust him, but thousands of citizens surrounded the building "as a human shield" and thus stopped the column, which included Foreign Legion soldiers. During the riots, dozens of civilians were killed who were hit by the fire of the French army, or the shots of the Ivorian army, the shelling of the rebels and the shooting of criminal gangs. In addition, businesses and foreign homes were looted and set on fire, and clashes took place between Muslims and Christians and idolaters (the religious division in the country: 60% local beliefs, 20% mostly Muslims Lebanese Shiites and another 20% Christians)
The president of South Africa, Tebo M'Baki, known as the "professional conciliator", urgently arrived in Abidjan to conduct peace talks, but returned to his country empty-handed and meanwhile summoned rebels to talks he would conduct with them in his capital in Pretoria. The UN Security Council, acting under French inspiration, decided to impose Sanctions on... the legal government of the Ivory Coast, which produces most of the cocoa that reaches the world market, which has already caused the price of chocolate to rise...
In the meantime, a separate "peace conference" was held in Lagos, the capital of Nigeria, at which the Nigerian president sat in the role of acting secretary-general of the West African Economic Commission. Absent from the festive meeting were representatives of the Ivory Coast government and the rebels.
"A special curiosity and Levantini is the case of the "Sandok" (cash box) of a Shiite organization that deals "in fundraising for Hezbollah in Lebanon. Two million dollars in cash, as well as gold, jewelry and silver bullion, disappeared with the "chest". A representative from Hezbollah came from Beirut to find out urgently where the money is and in the meantime... he is hiding in the Lebanese embassy, ​​all of this because he is afraid of the Lebanese Christians who threaten to prosecute him after he spoke in one of the mosques and accused them of theft. President Gbagbo protested France's actions and commented "that President Chirac did not ask the United Nations for permission for military action as he demanded from the US, right on the eve of the Iraq war." The offended French ambassador commented "that France does not need permission to protect its interests" and meanwhile British soldiers arrived in the country , who help evacuate the foreigners-
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Cocaine in a pencil case
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A six-year-old girl, a first-grader from Oakland, Florida, brought to class crack cocaine with a street price of one thousand dollars. The "hard" drug was found in a bag and a pencil case. The teacher was amazed when the little girl presented the package and boasted to her friends, "Look what I brought from home" along with the police arrived at school with the mother of the girl who claimed that her daughter had received the drug "as part of the collection of candies and sweets customary on Halloween" The mother was taken for questioning and the girl was suspended from the school. When a lawyer representing the student's family asked to know how the teacher and the other students managed to identify the drug? The headmistress of the school in Tangalo-Perak responded "that the students and the faculty identified the type of drug following a report as part of a war on the distribution of drugs in Hanukkah institutions and a drug display organized by the police". North of Florida and the USA, in the province of Alberta in Canada, the parents of a third grade student were arrested after, as part of the "nature" lessons, the children were asked to bring from home flowers or pots that were displayed at the fair
The flowers of our beautiful city" organized by the parents' committee.
The local police chief, who accompanied his son, also a XNUMXrd grade student, was amazed to discover a handsome pot with a marijuana bush in all its glory.
In the raid on the pot owner's house, a small drug nursery was discovered. The student's father responded to the poster and said "I had dozens of flower pots, I didn't feel that the boy was confiscating something for the benefit of the school..."
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All for the prosthesis
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Alan Coleman, a 42-year-old amputee from Utah, USA, was run over to death when he crawled from the sidewalk to the middle of the street late in the evening. The reason...minutes before, when he crossed the road, the links of the prosthesis came loose and the artificial leg dropped. Passers-by, as well as residents of a nearby pedestrian street, felt the help of the disabled person, but did not reach him in time. Coleman did not wait for the warning calls and just as he reached the prosthesis he was run over to death under the wheels of a passing truck.
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Poker raisins and sleeping pills
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An eighty-six-year-old from Bath, New York, was happy when his young neighbor, twenty-five-year-old Linda, surprised him with a fresh raisin cake. The surprise turned to bewilderment when the elderly man decided to taste the cake and when he made a large cut he discovered pills of medicine among the raisins. to be prosecuted on the charge of attempting to cause bodily harm. If convicted, Linda the Good is expected to spend at least six years in the county jail for women. In the investigation it turned out that the old man had befriended him, included her in his not meager will. Linda's joy at the neighbor's kindness, with whom she used to play cards or watch TV, led her to decide and speed up the natural process. The elderly man, whose name was not released for fear of extortion in the future, moved, and to the surprise of his relatives, he announced that he had cut only a quarter of the amount he would bequeath to his impatient neighbor and explained, "She is an actress The best poker I've ever met"
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The fury of the church and the officer over...Alizi Peru
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The Ministry of Defense, the General Staff and the Catholic Church of Peru reacted with outrage and astonishment after the Supreme Constitutional Court ruled "that the cheerful and cheerful serving in the army are allowed to have sex in uniform or in civilian clothes at the army bases or outside the camps".
The decision was made following a complaint by lobbyists - Alizim, who claimed that the ban on having sex with a same-sex partner is an illegal regulation that goes against civil and human rights. According to Peru's military order, uniformed personnel are prohibited from engaging in "sex with their own sex or sex with their own sex."
The prohibition includes behavior in bases, camps and offices as well as during vacation and out of uniform. The military police are allowed to raid the houses of suspects under the section "adultery not according to the way of nature" to make arrests and even interrogate discharged soldiers, of whom it was learned that, being in uniform, they made love to members of the same sex. A pair of young homies, living as a family unit, are threatened that the military police will detain him for investigation and indictment, because the love relationship developed while the two were serving in the navy.
Now a high court will hear the appeal filed by the army, while the church fathers opened that they exerted pressure on statesmen so that the parliament would pass appropriate legislation against merrymakers in the army.
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The sailor dog and the captain…
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A veteran Danish seaman, who served as an engine officer on a container ship that visited Caribbean ports - was taken off the ship and arrested. The reason for removing the veteran sailor from the ship is that the man attacked and beat his captain until he was bloody, after he found out that the senior officer was making love to... his dog The sailor said that he was positively impressed by the special interest that the captain showed in his poodle dog and was happy when during the night shift, while he was in the engine room, the captain took a walk with the dog on deck and among the containers and even hosted him in his room. The story of bestial love was discovered by chance, when a sailor suffering from insomnia, the result of a sudden toothache, wandered nervously on the dark deck and to his astonishment saw the captain and the dog making out behind a lifeboat.
The owner of the dog, who heard about the unusual couple and defended his dog's honor, did not wait for the captain's explanations, but attacked the dog adulterer with a wrench and by the way injured him in the face and skull. The captain was rushed to the nearby shore where he was treated in a hospital on one of the islands. The police, according to the procedures and standing orders, were called to the emergency room - they only heard that the officer was attacked by a sailor and arrested the owner of the dog at the port, who is waiting in the holding cell for a decision on whether he will be prosecuted or deported to his homeland? The police confiscated the dog, which in the meantime was handed over to an animal shelter, while the Bistali captain is apparently waiting for the decision of the Ghanaian shipping company that owns the container ships and will have to decide whether he will continue to serve on its deck.
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The ice fishing industry is in danger
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The rise of the Canadian dollar compared to the US dollar, which is weakened on purpose to stabilize the US markets, severely damages Canadian agricultural sectors intended for export mainly to the US market. At the top of the list is the marketing of cattle and pigs. Industries in many places in the West have been almost completely destroyed. Many ranchers claim that the poor exchange rate keeps buyers away from the United States and that they suffer no less than the prices of raw materials and tourism operators. Manitoba, Lake Winnipeg and Lake Manitoba. This is a special fishing branch, in which fish are caught by drilling holes in the ice, through which the collected fishing nets are inserted, along with the fishing spoils, through another and more distant hole. The branch uses special equipment that includes net cranes, large ice drills, vehicles Chained ice called "Bombadir" and a vehicle designed for driving on snow
Now, towards the beginning of the freezing season of the northern lakes, the cooperative company, which employs many fishermen, whose business comes in the winter, reported that buyers in the US decided to reduce orders, because the prices of fish in Canadian dollars, cannot compete with winter fish, of similar varieties, that Siberian fishermen sell.
The fish hunted in the winter are of special and highly sought-after varieties, which reach an appropriate weight precisely in the harsh winter when they swim close to the ice.
Lidan, which contains a collection of the articles of Yoram Mizrahi

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