My falling sickness

People with frontal lobe epilepsy are often drawn to religion, perhaps because they need a different mental dimension

24.5.2005
By: Karen Armstrong

The day I was diagnosed with epilepsy was probably one of the happiest in my life. For years I feared I was losing my mind. Sometimes I would be attacked for no reason by paralyzing terror. On other occasions I could go to one destination and find myself hours later in another place, not remembering how I got there.

That's why I was so relieved when I was told that I had a neurological condition that could be successfully treated with medication. I learned that my symptoms were caused by an injury to the frontal lobe of the brain, which impairs memory. I discovered that epilepsy is a common phenomenon. In the UK, one person out of every 131 suffers from epilepsy, and if they receive the right medication - 50% of them have seizures.

After the diagnosis, I suddenly understood many things. For example, I have always been drawn to the poetry of the poet Tennyson, on whom I wrote my Ph.D. I discovered that he also suffered from epilepsy, and it was she who filled his poems with powerful descriptions of trance states. My doctor was very interested in knowing that I was a nun, as people with frontal lobe epilepsy are often drawn to religion, perhaps because they need a different mental dimension.

Dostoevsky, who also suffered from epilepsy, described the feelings of exaltation, joy and peace that can accompany a seizure. When I first started writing about religion, I wondered if the visions experienced by the saints were not due to a neurological disorder. After 20 years of research, I discovered that all the major religious traditions in the world treat mystical ascension as a non-essential addition and see the ability to empathize as the true ecstatic ascension: that "exception" from the self that occurs when we remove ourselves from the throne of the center of our world and put another in our place.

In several of my books, I came out against stereotypical thinking, because epilepsy gave me the ability to observe how the mechanisms that produce prejudices work. Epilepsy has always had a stigma attached to it. A hundred years ago, patients were imprisoned in mental institutions or castrated. Even in our scientific age there are a surprising number of people who find it difficult to treat illness logically.

A recent survey by "Epilepsy Action", the UK's largest charity that treats the disease, revealed that a third of the elderly people questioned believed that their epilepsy had damaged their relationships with family and friends. I discovered that when I tell that I had an illness people get offended and change the subject as if it should not be mentioned in good company. Others insist that it is a psychosomatic disorder, even if in my case it was caused by a birth injury.

This was the only aspect of my situation that I found truly troubling. Epilepsy is still in a sense an unacceptable disease, because humans have a vague need to freeze it or change its nature. It creates alienation between the patient and people who prefer a fictitious or simplistic version of his complex situation. My experience with this type of prejudice sharpened my sensitivity to racial, religious or political discrimination.

Last week, "National Epilepsy Week" took place in Great Britain, which is designed to increase awareness of epilepsy - especially in relation to the elderly; 25% of new cases appear in this age group, but because of the stigma, many old people do not seek treatment.

But the attitude towards the disease has a wider importance. In our polarized world we cannot afford to cultivate inaccurate perceptions that contradict the facts and create alienation between people. The fall disease seems scary because it is not understood. A more accurate understanding of it would be a victory over hundreds of years of ignorance and prejudice - another small step towards more tolerance and enlightenment that the world so desperately needs.

The author wrote books on religious topics, including "Muhammad, Biography of the Prophet", which was translated into Hebrew
Courtesy of Walla news